Thursday, February 3

quid pro quo


Could I go there you ask. I just might could, but Im not sure it would do any good. Without Louis and that greek god that was his boyfriend I dont know what else there is left. Some paintings, a mirror leaning against the wall and some Brooks brothers jackets in the closet perhaps. And if Im lucky, those jackets might still smell like Benson & Hedge and Old Raj gin. Other than that? Most likely nothing. Fifteen bedrooms and ten baths filled with nothing. One balcony that could fit an entire soccer field and a dining hall good enough for queens. To have a lot of space is worth nothing less than zero when you lack emotions or items to fill it with.

In the end, your stuff ends up owning you. Im thinking about throwing away all my dresses, to keep only one left for myself. Eat sleep and breath in it until the end of the year. If I have nothing, then Id possibly be up for a trip to the countryside. A time travel to when times weren't this rough.

9 comments:

Loulou said...
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Loulou said...
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Rudie Wilderness said...

oh belle darling, i miss your sweet face and telling anecdotes from our summers at the beach house in france. see you in london soon. lovelovelove

Linda Love London said...

Not that I know you, or how you're life is at all ( I havent a clue, since I dont understand, although I try. Its the curse of being brought up in a picture perfect family) but Belle, why dont you visit that house? It might give you some closure.

helen said...

i like throwing away things that i have held onto too. it is so liberating, even if the feeling only lasts for a few minutes.

nia said...

You would still be a queen of style in that one dress. You could go to the countryside and swim in the lake with the other swans with the dress on and then dance on the meadow like a fairy until the sun would dry it on you.

Cass. said...

Belle,

Wear the dress. Bring Old Raj and cigarettes.. and go

Christopher said...

Really great, I mean it. I've often thought about getting rid of everything and seeing how I would do in life with just my wits. Then I start missing my things so that won't happen anytime soon. It's an interesting fantasy that I think a lot of people have.

Tabs A. Geek said...

I can't count the number of times I've wanted to just get rid of everything, take only what I need, and go elsewhere to start over. Fleeing the ties that hold me down, and trying to find freedom in the dreams I once held.