I couldn't sleep, been up since yesterday morning. Eyes tired but body restless, to restless to sleep. Are you familiar with that feeling? I hate it. It's like my body is forcing me to be awake although all I want is to drift off. I used to take care of this by swallowing down two Propavan with some red wine and then I hazed off, but they took my pills in customs since I didn't have a prescription with me. And just alcohol won't do it for me anymore, I need stronger stuff and now I'm stranded without them.
Miri won't return my calls, I'm worried but I don't know what to do about it. I can't drive in this fucking country, the cars are all coming at me and I forget which side on the road to stay at. I'm scared all the time. In London, all I had to do was call my driver. Frank doesn't belive in having people working for him. He's an island he says, but that's all bullshit and we both know it.
Last night we had sushi in front on the tv, watched Breakfast at Tiffany's ,I'm like cat here, a no-name slob. We belong to nobody, and nobody belongs to us. We don't even belong to each other, and I felt quite comfortable when he called me daughter instead of Belle in the begining of some useless sentence. What if I would stay?